The American Idol girls have been winnowed down to ten, and this is not necessarily a good thing. After a week that blew the audience - and the men - away, the dizziest of judges seemed to send forth telekinetic Paula waves designed to sap contestants of their strength, will, and any common sense in song selection. Suffice to say, plucking the best performances from last night's bruising reality check was a grim task best aided by copious amounts of Robitussen. Only through a hazy, pharmaceutically induced hallucination did I, like Paula, begin to realize they are all stars - and hey, my fingers look funny.
- Melissa continued channeling her perfectly serviceable homage to Faith Hill. Competant, consistent, and destined to be lost in the shuffle in two or three weeks.
- Sans Farrah hair, Paris activated the flux capacitor and found an even older song in Wind Beneath My Wings. Ladies and gentlemen, we are mere episodes away from a flapper dress and the Charleston.
- Ayla can kick your ass and channel Celine Dion - just like the real Celine, come to think of it.
- Mandisa - readers ask, we provide. Borrowing Aretha's wardrobe, Paris' hair, and her own good-humored personality, one of the best idols played clean up on a messy, messy night.
Paula Abdul, say it with me: intervention. The increasingly and inexplicably high judge is often lucky when she catches a caboose of thought. Ethereal, argumentative, and given to creepy compliments that recommend amputation to contestants, I've added the best "WTF is going on with Paula?" moments from last night's show. Enjoy.
[Watch video – 9:50, WMV format, high bandwidth]
[Watch video – 9:50, WMV format, low bandwidth]