Abdul entered in the get-up pictured on the right and tried to defuse Jay Leno's previous jokes about her chemically enhanced state by claiming (jokingly?) to be an alcoholic.
Of course, anyone who pays even fleeting attention to Paula on "American Idol" probably suspects her substance of choice is a bit stronger than hooch. As my co-blogger told me, it's like "watching a high woman pretending to be a sober person pretending to be a serial drunk."
As a pre-emptive strike against David Letterman's attorneys, she slurred her way through a "Top Five" list of reasons why "drinks" too much. The audience tried to choke out a few mercy laughs, but you could literally hear the douche chills. BRRrrrrr ...
Jay also asked her about her "rough week," an allusion to her having suffered an alleged assault, but she wasn't forthcoming on details. According to UPI:
US Weekly ... said Abdul and her former boyfriend, Dante Spencer, got into an altercation with former CAA agent Jim Lefkowitz at a party Saturday night.
Is that the drug addict's version of "she fell down the stairs"?
[Watch video – 10:52, WMV format, high bandwidth]
[Watch video – 10:52, WMV format, low bandwidth]