Putting the Ex in Extra Fabulous

Oh sweet Jesus, please let this be available in Chicago:

HUNTINGTON, Conn. Oct. 25 /Christian Wire Service/ -- Stephen and Irene Bennett, husband and wife, founders of Stephen Bennett Ministries, Inc., announce the launching of their national radio program, Straight Talk Radio, scheduled to debut in eight states on October 31.

Formerly a daily one-minute public service announcement running on numerous Christian and Conservative radio stations, Straight Talk Radio has been "revamped" into a new, lively, daily half-hour program.

Lead in music? Diana Ross.

Straight Talk Radio is one of the very first – if not the first – daily, national Conservative Christian radio programs to deal exclusively with the number one, most controversial issue facing our culture today -

Whether or not Madonna has gone all Valerie Cherish?

homosexuality.

Oh. . . I bet they work in the Madonna angle anyway.

"When Irene and I get behind the microphones, watch out. There's no telling what's going to happen."

I'm thinking Cher impressions.

Irene replied, "I believe Straight Talk Radio is going to catch on like wildfire."

Things often catch fire when Stephen's around . . .

We are going to educate, encourage, engage and equip people

I think people should be equipped, too.

Stephen Bennett is a former homosexual who abandoned his 11-year promiscuous homosexual lifestyle, along with a long term homosexual relationship, after becoming a Christian in 1992. Irene, who became a Christian in the 80's, was never involved in homosexuality. Fully knowing Stephen's past, Irene accepted Stephen's proposal for marriage in 1993 without any reservations.

Translation: Irene was 30 and desperate.

While the Bennett's primarily minister full-time as evangelists to the homosexual community and provide support for their families, the couple firmly believes they have a dual calling.

Hrm, the bisexual escape clause. That's just poor form.

Stephen replied, "I'm very excited about Straight Talk Radio. I can guarantee you, this will not be a dull show by any means, nor will we be whacking people over the head with the Bible. Make no mistake though, God's Word will boldly go forth. We're going to tackle many issues and stories few would dare to touch, even injecting a bit of the 'Bennett' humor (never though at the expense of any individual, well except maybe myself.)"

This entire paragraph is gayer than I am. Stephen enjoys whacking, boldly going forth, tackling things few would dare to touch, all while injecting various objects, sometimes into himself. Ian Fleming would be scandalized by this many entendres.

I cannot wait for this.

Comments

[Dan (AKA GayPatriotWest)]

That Bennett guy's so cute, I might become an ex-gay for him!

[The Malcontent]

I either need to adjust my monitor, or that dude was doing overtime in Dr. Braverman's chair.

[Robbie]

I call photoshop shennanigans.

[Chad]

Dan, I hope you're being facetious.

But at least Bennett can take solice in that, should this radio thing fail (God forbid!), he is sure to have a lucrative career hocking Crest White Strips.

[Dan (AKA GayPatriotWest)]

Chad, yep, I'm just having fun with this.

[Patrick Rothwell]

He looks like a young Liberace in a way...

Also, wasn't "straight talk" the campaign theme of Jim McGreevey? How odd.....