Your Daily Brokeback

Guess what?  It's another "Brokeback Mountain" day here, of sorts.  I'm sure the cheers and jeers are flying in roughly equal measure right now.  (Didn't I do a post a while back about being "Brokebacked out"?)

This post is a three-fer from me, and then Robbie says we should expect one from him later today.  (I should warn you that much of this is NSFW.)

First up is last night's "Drawn Together" on Comedy Central.  The "Malcon-noisseurs" among you know that I follow the show and have about as unhealthy an obsession with Xandir as one can have with a cartoon character.

"Drawn" is known for regularly going gay, with storylines that have included the gay marriage of Xandir and Spanky Ham, the Internet download pig.

This time it was Captain Hero who was vying for Xandir's affections.  Hero showed up in the poorly conceived guise of "Tim Tommerson" as a way of exploring his own possible gay tendencies.  And how the hot cartoon love did commence.

[Watch video – 8:38, WMV format, high bandwidth]

[Watch video – 8:38, WMV format, low bandwidth]

Next is the latest moment of gay zen from Howard Stern, who has been having a lot of them lately. 

I know my sense of humor probably runs a wider gamut from high-brow to low-brow than most people's.  In fact, my brow is sometimes so low that I trip over it, which is why the Stern Show's parody "Buttcrack Mountain" this morning got at least a couple of chuckles out of me.

[Listen – 5:32, 2.53mb, MP3 format]

And finally, after the jump is something that has already been on a few websites, but which I came across for the first time last night.

If you're familiar with "Brokeback," you'll remember the trips down the mountain to restock provisions.  I howled as the hubbie read me the "Brokeback Mountain Weekly Grocery Lists," which became more and more – shall we say – "elaborate" as that long summer herding sheep wore on.

WEEK ONE

Beans
Bacon
Coffee
Whiskey

WEEK TWO

Beans
Ham
Coffee
Whiskey

WEEK THREE

Beans al fresca
Thin-sliced Bacon
Hazelnut Coffee
Sky vodka & Tanqueray gin
K-Y gel

WEEK FOUR

Beans en salade
Pancetta
Coffee (espresso grind)
5-6 bottles best Chardonnay
2 tubes K-Y gel

WEEK FIVE

Fresh Fava beans
Jasmine rice
Prosciutto, approx. 8 ounces,
thinly sliced
Medallions of veal
Porcini mushrooms
1/2 pint of heavy whipping cream
1 Cub Scout uniform, size 42 long
5-6 bottles French Bordeaux (Estate Reserve)
1 extra large bottle Astro-glide

WEEK SIX

Yukon Gold potatoes
Heavy whipping cream
Asparagus (very thin)
Organic Eggs
Spanish Lemons
Gruyere cheese (well aged)
Crushed Walnuts
Arugula
Clarified Butter
Extra Virgin Olive oil
Pure Balsamic vinegar
6 yards white silk organdy
6 yards pale ivory taffeta
3 Cases of Dom Perignon Masters Reserve
Large tin Crisco

Comments

[Myackie]

G_d! Those "Drawn Together" guys are geniuses!

[MT]

So, Xandir's a top, huh? Hot.

[Malcontent]

See, Clay Aiken can be a top!

[Queer Conservative]

Clay Aiken might "sit" on top.

[Craig Ranapia]

The BM shopping lists were hilarious. Unfortunately, the better half and I finally saw the film tonight and had this dialogue coming (dry-eyed) out of the theatre:

"Brief Encounter?"
"Way Brief Encounter."
"Still, I'd rather get fucked by Heath Ledger than Trevor Howard."
"Meh..."

I'm probably going to get flamed for saying this, but does anyone really think this film - well done as it undeniably is - would have gotten 1% of the attention or box office without the gay angle? Hey, I think it says more about the world we live in than the actual quality of the film (and while I liked it, I wouldn't say it was any better or worse than widely-ignored Ang Lee films like 'Ride with the Devil' or 'The Ice Storm') but it's still worth asking...

[Malcontent]

Not by me, Craig. I pretty much stand by what I wrote a few weeks ago.

A good film + a terrible year for Hollywood + the gay angle = worth its weight in B.O. gold

[Robbie]

Right, Craig?

[Craig Ranapia]

Well, it's been known to happen now and then. :)

[Mike]

Forgive me, but how does the Brokeback Mountain story run *without* the gay angle?

[Robbie]

Well, I suppose a straight couple could have a summer fling, then retreat to their respective lives in distant locations, reuniting now and then to share their forbidden love.

Or something.

It sounds a bit like a Bronte novel.