The Malcontent

Landing in Snow is Hard

I really oughtn't complain about having to shovel my way through a twelve inch snowfall. Some people have it worse.

CHICAGO, Illinois (CNN) -- A Southwest Airlines jet slid off the runway during a driving snowstorm at Chicago's Midway Airport and slid into at least one vehicle at a nearby intersection on Thursday night, a spokeswoman for Chicago's Department of Aviation said.

Flight 1248, which was arriving from Baltimore, Maryland, slid through a fence separating the runway from the intersection, spokeswoman Wendy Abrams said.

"Through a fence," is a bit of an understatment. I live in a south burb, so Midway is about 10-15 minutes from me, and I drive through more often than not (my brother, a truck driver, is actually stuck in traffic over there at the moment). Basically, the airfield is surrounded by thick barricades, mainly as sound control (as the airport is in the middle of a neighborhood). Going through one of those is no small task. In addition, streets run parallel to these walls, only four or so feet from the barrier. Central Ave, 55th street, etc. So, this plane slid right into traffic. Pictures on the local news show a small car a mere foot or two from being inside one of wing engines.

As things stand, the only reported injuries are from people in cars on the street. The snow is still coming down around here rather furiously. Even watching cable news, it's difficult to see. Originally we were supposed to receive 1-3 inches. Then 4-6. Then 7-9. We're approaching a foot here on the south side. So, this should be a terrific mess.

Reading, Writing, and Propaganda

While reading one of those longish annual lists full of useless holiday trivia yesterday, I learned 4% of Americans believe Thanksgiving commemorates the defeat of the Canadians. So, naturally, I'm over-joyed to learn our schools have so much free time, they can fill children's heads with this vital knowledge:

An essay contest at a New Mexico high school asks students to explain why preserving marriage between men and women is vital society and why unborn children merit respect and protection.

The contest, at Farmington's Piedra Vista High School, is being held in connection with an essay contest sponsored by United Families International, an organization whose primary mission is "to strengthen the family by promoting marriage between one man and woman and the protection of human life, including unborn children."

Not to be outdone in the race to indoctrinate our children, the Left has its own heroes:

The school superintendent whose district includes Mount Anthony Union High School has labeled "inappropriate" and "irresponsible" an English teacher's use of liberal statements in a vocabulary quiz.

"I wish Bush would be (coherent, eschewed) for once during a speech, but there are theories that his everyday diction charms the below-average mind, hence insuring (sic) him Republican votes," said one question on a quiz written by English and social studies teacher Bret Chenkin.

I cannot wait to see how the next generation turns out.

Perjury for Demmies

  Welcome, Democrats. Please set your tray tables and spin machines to their full locked and upright positions. We have professional medical staff standing by just inside the terminal at our destination should any of you suffer excessive cranial apoplexy. The captain does regret any severe cognitive turbulence we may encounter during our historical journey. Pundits and New York Times columnists will be on hand with complimentary conscience vouchers for those who've had their understanding of the rule of law shaken free of their complacency compartments. History regrets any emotional or psychic damage this may cause.

We hope you enjoy our in-flight documentaries, "When Presidents Lie to Grand Juries," and its sequel "The Return of Perjury - Republican Edition." The captain would like me to remind you that rule of law should remain safely fastened within the constitution, as during unforeseen partisan spin, these standards may break loose and shake about the political cabin at any time.

Cindy Sheehan Gets SWOTted