The Malcontent

Quote of the Day

Yes, it might be taken a bit out of context, but it's still fun:

"If I had to go male it would be (Rep.) Kendrick Meek (D-Fla.) because I would just love to be with him." — Rep. Tim Ryan (D-Ohio) on going male

Thanks, But No Thanks, Howie

NGLTF returns $5,000 to the DNC, blasting Chairman Howard Dean's complete ignorance of his own party's platform regarding gays:

WASHINGTON, May 8 —In a Christian Broadcasting News segment aired today on The 700 Club concerning how Democrats are reaching out to evangelicals, Howard Dean, chair of the Democratic National Party, said, "The Democratic Party platform from 2004 says that marriage is between a man and a woman. That's what it says. I think where we may take exception with some religious leaders is that we believe in inclusion, that everybody deserves to live with dignity and respect, and that equal rights under the law are important." In fact, the DNC 2004 platform says, "We support full inclusion of gay and lesbian families in the life of our nation and seek equal responsibilities, benefits, and protections for these families. In our country, marriage has been defined at the state level for 200 years, and we believe it should continue to be defined there. We repudiate President Bush's divisive effort to politicize the Constitution by pursuing a 'Federal Marriage Amendment.' Our goal is to bring Americans together, not drive them apart."

Bravo to NGLTF for showing integrity.

On gays, Democrats continue to race Republicans to the bottom.  So to speak.  (Ahem.)

Freddy Quimby Meets Jeff Conaway

May 5, 2006, Boston Herald:

U.S. Rep. Patrick Kennedy insisted yesterday that he had consumed “no alcohol” before he slammed his Mustang convertible into a concrete barrier near his office, but a hostess at a popular Capitol Hill watering hole told the Herald she saw him drinking in the hours before the crash. [snip] Earlier in the evening, Kennedy issued a statement through his office blaming the accident and strange behavior surrounding it on prescription drugs.

Jan. 8, 2006, a drunken Jeff Conaway on "Celebrity Fit Club":

"Everybody, thank you for your concern. It was nothing to be concerned about. I took a couple of Benadryl and I got loopy. ... I am on prescription drugs, yes."

UPDATE: Not to be flip about this situation, because Kennedy now has stopped lying and is going into drug rehab.  Hey, it worked for P.O.B.

The Yellow Badge of No Courage

Rarely do I find myself in agreement with Richard Cohen – that is, when I'm not so put off by his usual solipsism and general Leftishness that I will actually read him.

But today, in his column on Stephen Colbert's turn at the White House Correspondents Association dinner, he "speaks truth to power" about one of the Left's favorite bromides de jour:

Why are you wasting my time with Colbert, I hear you ask. Because he is representative of what too often passes for political courage, not to mention wit, in this country. His defenders -- and they are all over the blogosphere -- will tell you he spoke truth to power. This is a tired phrase, as we all know, but when it was fresh and meaningful it suggested repercussions, consequences -- maybe even death in some countries. When you spoke truth to power you took the distinct chance that power would smite you, toss you into a dungeon or -- if you're at work -- take away your office. But in this country, anyone can insult the president of the United States. Colbert just did it, and he will not suffer any consequence at all. He knew that going in. He also knew that Bush would have to sit there and pretend to laugh at Colbert's lame and insulting jokes. Bush himself plays off his reputation as a dunce and his penchant for mangling English. Self-mockery can be funny. Mockery that is insulting is not. The sort of stuff that would get you punched in a bar can be said on a dais with impunity. This is why Colbert was more than rude. He was a bully. [snip] He had a chance to tell the president and much of important (and self-important) Washington things it would have been good for them to hear. But he was, like much of the blogosphere itself, telling like-minded people what they already know and alienating all the others. In this sense, he was a man for our times. He also wasn't funny.

And if another person cites that Jefferson-quote-that-Jefferson-never-said, "Dissent is the highest form of patriotism," I will throttle them.

[h/t OpinionJournal]

Bart(lett)'s Familiar Quotations

Find a "Simpsons" quote for every occasion.

How scary is it that I have probably used a majority of those in the past week?

Quote of the Morning

"Poor bastard took it better than a gay porn star. ... Wait, he did take it from a gay porn star." — Rep. Linda Sanchez, (D-CA) on Scott McClellan (from "DC's Funniest Celebrity" contest, as quoted by The Hotline, sub. req.)

Quote of the Day

"You know, I think that I ... you'll have to ask him or his office." — Sen. Hillary Clinton, when asked why her husband's new Smithsonian portrait shows the former president with no wedding ring

Quote of the Day

Doesn't Rick Santorum believe this is a sin?:

"He tends to come from behind."

— Ed Gillespie on Sen. Rick Santorum

Quote of the Day

Did you hear Sam Brownback made a movie? It's about two cowboys who meet, go straight and decide to devote their lives to stopping stem cell research. It's called, "Brownback Mountain."

— Attributed (outside of quotation marks) to Sen. Arlen Specter (R-Pa.)

Quote(s) of the Evening

"Rarely is the question asked, 'Is our children learning'?"

— George W. Bush, March 29, 2001

"Everyone knows there is not enough votes to support a filibuster."

— Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid, Jan. 27, 2006

Quote of the Day

"I don't support our troops. ... [B]eing against the war and saying you support the troops is one of the wussiest positions the pacifists have ever taken — and they're wussy by definition."

— Joel Stein, writing in the Los Angeles Times

Well.  At least he's an honest moonbat.

Quote of the Day

"I kind of describe myself as the free safety for this speaker (Hastert)," (Rep. David) Dreier says. "Wherever he throws the ball, I just want to make sure I'm there to catch it."

Reminded that free safety is a position on defense, not offense, he says: "I just want to catch the pass."

— From Wall Street Journal, via The Hotline (sub. req.)

"Wide receivers" and "tight ends," of course, catch most of the passes on football teams.  Little wonder, then, that Dreier's clumsy metaphor steered clear of offense.

Quote of the Morning

"Now, is (Splash) the best name for Ted Kennedy's dog? ... Isn't that like that Jack Abramoff guy naming his dog Bribe?"

— Jay Leno, from "The Tonight Show," 1/11/06

And Joe Biden's dog is named "Windbag."

Quote of the Day

"I go in the woods early in the morning and imitate a sexy hen."

— Jimmy Carter, from "The Tonight Show," on hunting turkey (from The Hotline, sub. only)

"Takes one to know one."

— The Malcontent

Quote of the Day

"9/11 was too ambiguous. You couldn't prove how the government was somehow in on the deal. … New ­Orleans was undeniable irresponsibility."

— Madonna

Is it possible for her to shut her friggin' yap and keep singing?

Remarks Best Kept "Sub Rosa"

Not only was Rosa Parks' funeral a moment of figurative shame for liberals, as Robbie pointed out, but it was an occasion for Democrats to make more literal buffoons of themselves, as well.

First you have this from Michigan Gov. Jennifer Granholm, a creepy echo of John Kerry's idiotic quote from his 2004 convention speech:

"On behalf of the state of Michigan, ma'am, we are reporting for duty."

Then we have John Kerry himself, who like a good liberal never misses a chance to turn even the solemnest occasion into an identity-politics grievance session, with this non sequitur:

"It is our time to demand that every vote be counted," he said. [From the subscription-based Hotline, not yet available elsewhere online.]

A whole year after Bush was re-elected, and he's still yammering on about this?  Whose vote needs to be re-counted at a funeral, exactly?  The Grim Reaper's?

And finally, Bill Clinton neatly sums up the phenomenon of white liberal guilt with this:

"When Rosa showed us that black folks didn't have to sit in the back any more, two of my friends and I, who strongly approved of what she had done, decided we didn't have to sit in the front any more," he said.

What is it about Bill Clinton's history that makes me want to call shenanigans on that story?

Quote of the Day

"Excuse me if I find the Democrats' record on gay issues just as offensive as I do the Republicans' record. Neither party has earned the vote of gay Americans."

—Ken Sain, news editor of the Washington Blade, reacting to an item we linked to yesterday on gay baiting by NYC mayoral candidate Fernando Ferrer

Cheney Watch?

From the AP:

[White House Spokesman Scott] McClellan said Cheney ... is doing a "great job" as vice president.

So is a "great job" better or worse than a "heckuva job"?

His Nose Is to the Grindstone, Too

From today's Hotline Last Call (sub. req.):

"A guy who is at his best painting anus-against-the-world picture" -- the Montgomery Advertiser, illustrating the importance of proper spacing.

Sadly, the item has since been corrected.

Quote Asshole of the Day

"Unfortunately, it's the crossroads where Katrina meets Rita.  I always knew I was against same-sex unions."

— Sen. David Vitter (R-La.)

You might want to fire whichever writer came up with that one for you, Senator.

Is it not enough that some politicians have to be against gay marriage, but that they also have to be incredible jerks about it?  It's hard to count the ways that one brief statement is insensitive.

[HT: Queerty]